"ABP - Always Be Partyin'" on 09/30/2004

Two parties in one night is something I have to do occasionally, because very few people in L.A. ever want to have parties on weekends, or even on Fridays, so lots of people do Thursdays.

I guess going to two is an achievement, too, because Andrew Breitbart (self-described as "Matt Drudge's Bitch") says he's never done it. Then he started to talk about how the Left is trying to censor him and Anne Coulter. I expect to see 'em both (Coulter appears in one of the movies, and Andrew's a speaker) if I indeed manage to get my credentials to the right-wing Liberty Film festival this weekend. Should be interesting. Andrew's reaction when he heard I might be covering? "Oh no." He describes the mainstream media as Marxist -- I am therefore off the charts. But if I didn't cover it, I'd be guilty of covering it up, eh?

Andrew also says he refuses to color his hair like mine. Thank goodness for that. None of you should imitate my hair, ever. It owns you.

This was at the first party of the evening, at 345 Maple Drive, held by the Press Club and Reason Magazine. As usual I got there early, and hung out at the restaurant bar, which had an elaborate selection of scotches. I order an Absolut Raspberri, and am charged $10 for it. It isn't very good -- artificial tasting. I ask for an extra shot of cranberry to neutralize the taste. Australian-accented businessmen beside me talk about selling airlines. This is a high-roller type bar, obviously.

Which is why the party was actually held in the building lobby, outside of the actual restaurant, to separate the riff-raff from the airline CEOS. Drink tickets were sold for $5 -- one ticket per beer, two for a cocktail or wine. Ergo, this was the first such party where drinking beer was actually a better deal. Hors d'heuvres consisted of variations of bread and cheese (pizza, quesadillas) and weird-looking meatloaf and/or Spam sandwiches that no-one touched.

Mostly familiar faces here, and a lot of boringly dressed guys in suits. But a few new people show up to find out about Brian Doherty's Burning Man book. Luke Ford surprisingly doesn't seem to be pimping his own books as much as he could, so I try to mention them in conversations to others wherever possible. I liked the one that I was able to afford. He does say something about overhearing Matt Welch singing the socialist Internationale in the shower.

The Reason photgrapher takes a photo of two beautiful black women who provocatively raise their legs to pose. He says he'll take one of me if I can top that.

Note: Daring me to show off for the cameras always works. I mentioned that I have a large tattoo on my back, and would be happy to show it off. Variety's Pat Saperstein, standing with me, says she'll show hers too, but then she doesn't. I do, and Cathy Seipp somehow thinks I'm taking my pants off, even though it's just my shirt. Pat makes a crack about how I always take my clothes off. I say I only do so around her.

At least I'm svelte -- two people this week have said so (Hear that, mom?)

Someone -- Kate Coe, I think -- was going on about John Kerry's orange tan. As a wrestling fan, I've been utterly desensitized to bad tans over the years.

Sadly, I must leave right as the lovely Deborah Vankin and Sharan Street show up. They liven up any gathering, but I'm already late to the next function. I give David Ehrenstein a ride home, then head for Koreatown.

Young Man Kang, director of THE LAST EVE (for which I'll be shooting my scenes Monday) is showing an older film of his, the undistributed DEATH VALLEY DIARIES. I catch the last half hour, and it's good...light years ahead of his first flick CUPID'S MISTAKE. It's a BLAIR WITCH type deal about people lost in Death Valley at night. He started it before BLAIR WITCH, then finished it four years later.

Gregory Hatanaka appears in the film as a car salesman. I missed his scene, but Young tells the entire audience that he had to get Greg drunk to get a good performance out of him. Portrait artist/coin trick magician Bill Dale is very good in it as a scary character. Young himself is convincing playing a film-maker named Young.

Film-maker Donald F. Glut is at the reception -- he proudly has a CD out now, by his Mike Nesmith-produced band that recorded it about 37 years ago! Just came out, on a label that I think is called Sundaze, or something like that.

A documentary crew from Korean TV is also here -- earlier in the day, they interviewed me at the Sunset 5, and gave me a nice hand-crafted pencil box as a thank-you gift. Off-camera, they asked me if it was true that Hollywood was run by Jews, gays, and USC graduates. I said I didn't think it was run by gays, and while some of the top people in the business are Jewish, saying "the Jews" implies there's some sort of unified religious agenda, which I don't believe there is. As for USC grads -- less and less. With the rise of the Internet, Netflix, and cheap cameras, film school is becoming obsolete. You learn more by doing.

Still, if being a USC grad helps me to run Hollywood, I'll take that advantage. Anyway, Universal is run by the French, I think, and Sony by the Japanese. But that could change in a heartbeat nowadays.

Wine, donuts, and cheetos are the sustenance here. I try some red, and then some horrific sweetened and flavored wine that tastes like cherry NyQuil.

Young's having a party at some mansion this weekend. I guess if I don't get to do the conservative film fest, I'll get decadent one way or another.

Here's hoping for a decent night's sleep tonight. Been woken up early several days running by incidents beyond my control. If you call me in the a.m., I ain't answering.