I never really “review” movies that I have significant roles in – it’s too hard to distance myself. So let’s not call this a review, exactly; but I did watch the director’s cut last night in an all-but [...]]]> There’s a director’s cut of WICKED LAKE coming, and I got an exclusive first look at it.

I never really “review” movies that I have significant roles in – it’s too hard to distance myself. So let’s not call this a review, exactly; but I did watch the director’s cut last night in an all-but finished form (the dialogue was slightly off-sync or unmixed in a couple scenes). And boy, do I wish this was the one we could have shown the public first.

I’m not blind to the flaws of the original film. I love it, and will always love it, but I get why others don’t. Tonally it was an odd mix of director and script: the screenplay was balls-out brutality written as a giant F.U. to critics who were whining about movies like HOSTEL, while Zach, for as long as I’ve known him (i.e. since film school) has made meditative dreamscapes, usually featuring some kind of animation at some stage. I used to kid him about how he was going to find a way to get animation into WICKED LAKE. Lo and behold, in the director’s cut, he has. I won’t spoil how, but it absolutely works.

Most substantially, the director’s cut, which is entitled WICKED, WICKED LAKE, features a complete visual and aural overhaul…

I didn’t do any fast food reviews this week, but I did review some wrestling T-shirts.

TNA has taken a long time to get it together as regards their merchandise. The key to a hot-selling wrestling shirt is that it has to work even for someone who has no clue about wrestling. Where TNA has erred in the past is putting slogans on the back of the shirt, and the wrestler’s name on the front. For example, I could probably sell a shirt sporting the slogan “Big Sexy” to any number of large guys, but if that’s only written on the back, while the front just says “Kevin Nash,” I’m not gonna have much luck except with Kevin Nash fans.

And finally, a review of the boneriffic movie CHLOE.

CHLOE is based on the French film NATHALIE… (yes, the ellipses are part of the title), which, with its more cerebral approach to kinkiness, would seem more in line with what I’d expect from Canadian-raised director Atom Egoyan, who can often be as chilly and detached as his home country. Here, however, he’s gone balls-out Hollywood style in his approach to the material, adding more onscreen sex and a FATAL ATTRACTION element entirely absent from the source.

In a pitch black room, a young man named Justin (Ward Roberts) sits in a sacred circle, lighting candles, reciting from a Necronomicon-like tome, and drawing blood with a knife. He’s looking to [...]]]> (Obligatory Disclaimer: I have worked on prior films with some of the individuals involved in this one, and found the experience generally pleasant)

In a pitch black room, a young man named Justin (Ward Roberts) sits in a sacred circle, lighting candles, reciting from a Necronomicon-like tome, and drawing blood with a knife. He’s looking to summon a demon.

Lo…and behold. The demon Lo (Jeremiah Birkett) probably isn’t quite what was expected. Sure, he LOOKS freaky enough, like some cross between a Roswell alien and Star Trek’s Mugatu that’s missing a lower body. But he’s also something of a wise-ass, instantly demanding that Justin “clean the shit from your pants and tell me what you want.” When Justin tells him he’s looking for a girl that was taken by another demon, Lo tries to claim that Justin is racist for tarring all demons with the same brush. Then he pulls out a cigarette, because demons “do anything we want to do…it’s cool!”

Before helping, Lo demands that Justin reveal a bit more of himself and the girl he’s looking for, and so we get some flashbacks, but not just any kind. Making a virtue of his low budget rather than trying to cheaply steal actual locations, writer-director Travis Betz chooses to re-stage the scenes from Justin’s life on painted wooden sets, flanked by real-live, gold-painted tragedy and comedy faces.

We learn that Justin fell for the unusual April (Sarah Lassez) when she came up to him in a diner and started enthusiastically eating his salad. As they got to know each other, her charming naivete won him over further. But of course, she has a dark secret involving a book…it’s pretty obvious upfront that it’s gonna turn out to be the very same book Justin used to summon Lo.

And Lo isn’t the only bizarre character lurking in the darkness: there’s also a green rodent-girl, a frightening bartender, and a reptilian demon named Jeez (Devin Barry) who dresses like a naval admiral…with a swastika armband. Also, when he feels like it, he can command a doo-wop band of zombies for some sing-song exposition.

Needless to say, love it or hate it — and I’m guessing some of you may find my love for it suspect — this is one unique flick.

It’s a very tricky balance of tone that’s being attempted here. Horror-comedy is tough at the best of times, and horror-comedy on a shoestring with believably frightening demons has got to be a handful. Mostly, though, it works. Some bits are strained: a sequence in which Lo conjures up two of his victims from Hell to say things like “It really sucks here!” doesn’t pack the power it should, and isn’t particularly funny either, even when it goes for a cheap sex joke. And there’s a late-stage disorientation on Justin’s part that feels like it’s there for the sake of being there.

The overall concept, though, holds strong. Though the viewer knows instinctively that the surreal staging of events is partly a budgetary call, the execution is creative, and it’s easy to believe demons like these might play with your head in exactly this fashion. Tom Devlin’s creature makeups are inventive and different…I truly thought Lo was being played by an amputee or a little person, and am not sure how he hid his legs so well. Only quibble is that Jeez has some bare human skin around his eyes, and I would think a bout with the green airbrush could have fixed that. (Devlin did my zombie makeup on SNZN)

Also, Jeez is a dumb name for a demon, considering it’s generally considered to be short for Jesus.

Roberts and Birkett are the ones required to carry the whole story, though, and they do. Birkett manages to emote through thick layers of whatever the hell it is that makes him a demon, while Roberts gets a couple of scenes where he literally has to “talk to the hand,” giving voice to both it and himself.

And then there’s Sarah as April, the object of adoration. If you’ve seen the movies I’ve been in with her (UNTIL THE NIGHT and MAD COWGIRL), you’ll have no problem believing she can embody that. However, I’ve never seen her actually do comedy prior to this. Turns out she’s a natural at playing sweetly ignorant, something of a 180 from prior roles.

And if you’re reading this, Sarah, Tom told me you were even harder to get the contacts into than I was. Thanks to you, he had the patience for me!

LO comes out on DVD today. Whether or not I be blinded by biases, I hope I’ve given you enough to decide if it’s worth a  look for you.

Wrestling fans will know the significance of my wearing that shirt on that day.

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Funny thing about the Sahara, is while checking in, guys waiting in line for reception were drinking beers. Most had cowboy hats and giant belt buckles.

This [...]]]> A few holiday snapshots from the SILENT NIGHT, ZOMBIE NIGHT crew’s trip to Las Vegas last week.

Wrestling fans will know the significance of my wearing that shirt on that day.

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Funny thing about the Sahara, is while checking in, guys waiting in line for reception were drinking beers. Most had cowboy hats and giant belt buckles.

This looks like the entrance to an adult bookstore, but it’s actually a comic shop/screening room.

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Wes is staggered by the beauty of the town.

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View from the hotel at night.

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Our poster boy, Santa Zombie Chris Gabriel.

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Ugly giant chia pets…or something.

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Fake Venice at the Venetian (of course).

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Strategy session.

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We ran into famous Star Trek actor Patrick Stewart.

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Jack grows weary.

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The next day.

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Click on any of the images to my Buzznet gallery for a few more.

First, a special appearance by Jasper Boring!

Second, my interview with “James Duval”…

And finally, the masterpiece…an interview with Douglas Dunning.

Back soon.

The UK horror magazine Gorezone, seen above, has a big feature on SILENT NIGHT, ZOMBIE NIGHT that includes interviews with Sean Cain, Vernon Wells, and Felissa Rose…as well as four full-color pictures of ME in zombie get-up (among many others). I’m not identified by name, but if [...]]]> So here’s a round-up of stuff involving me lately…

The UK horror magazine Gorezone, seen above, has a big feature on SILENT NIGHT, ZOMBIE NIGHT that includes interviews with Sean Cain, Vernon Wells, and Felissa Rose…as well as four full-color pictures of ME in zombie get-up (among many others). I’m not identified by name, but if you’ve been keeping up you’ll know which ones are me. It’s issue 46, cover-dated August 2009, and is available in the US as well, if you can still find a decent newsstand that’s open anywhere.

Meanwhile, Creep Creepersin was interviewed at Associated Content about DING DONG DEAD.

I sort-of make an appearance in this Youtube parody of David Poland’s Hot Blog…though it’s me doing Daniel Plainview.

And finally, if you didn’t read my review yet of the Patton Oswalt movie BIG FAN, it’s up at E! Look for a GAMER review this Friday.

That’s right kiddies, the PG13-ish horror romp DING DONG DEAD will be shooting in just a couple weeks. Ding Dong Dead is a story about a man (played by writer/actor Luke Y. Thompson) who is turned mad by an all girl gang of professional ding dong ditchers [...]]]> The announcement has been made on  Creep Creepersin’s blog:

That’s right kiddies, the PG13-ish horror romp DING DONG DEAD will be shooting in just a couple weeks. Ding Dong Dead is a story about a man (played by writer/actor Luke Y. Thompson) who is turned mad by an all girl gang of professional ding dong ditchers (the classic prank in which someone rings a doorbell and then runs away). Things get ugly when he decides to fight back! Also attached to the project are Elina Madison, Dulce Death, Devanny Pinn, Tara Strand, Tara Cardinal, Megan Combes, Shannon Freyer, Yvette Bass and Kelsey Kernstine. There will be more updates on cast in the coming days. so watch out and cover your door bell!!! Follow me at www.twitter.com/creepersin for updates. and remember to keep it creepy!

Creep Creepersin is an Orange County, California-based filmmaker/musician/writer whose previous movies include the likes of OC BABES AND THE SLASHER OF ZOMBIETOWN, VAGINAL HOLOCAUST, and ORGY OF BLOOD.

Luke Y. Thompson, an actor and writer known for his appearances in the likes of WICKED LAKE and MAD COWGIRL, will play his first lead role in DING DONG DEAD. He is also a regular contributor to E! Online and the LA Weekly.