LYT's Weblog

Haha... too good to be true? Maybe.

Cool to see ya reportin', btb.

I suspect the publicity will attract new (male) club members.

The story sounds like the setting for a Robert Altman comedy, though I know there won't be any more of those.

It reminds me of Health, which was sort of inspired by Watergate. Glenda Jackson and Lauren Bacall played dirty tricks on each other as they competed to become the next president of an organization devoted to what is now called alternative medicine. It's worth tracking down, if you haven't seen it. I don't think it was ever commercially released. I saw it on a college film club double bill with "The Loved One" years ago.

OK, I just went back and read the linked correspondence. The screenplay writes itself!

"I certainly did not meant to imply that...anyone had sex with underaged girls, committed rape, or stole anything...I only mentioned the possibilities of these issues occurring because I had concern of such things for future possible liability to the Club."

-- Bruce Willis, as Grant Ivey, letting the rival board members know he's got them on videotape.

"put through severe stress by a handful of male members"

"I will once again assume the position"

Rrrrarrr! The claws come out as Meryl Streep, playing uptight old-money Gail Ivey, and Angelina Jolie (or maybe Reese Witherspoon?) as Paris Hilton-style rich trash who cruelly strings along a bunch of guys with the promise that she'll marry them into the club if they spend enough on her, spit email-inspired double-entendres at each other over Cosmopolitans.

"We are Jonathans. We remain Jonathans".

The segue into a speech about how whatever happened, or, well, uh, didn't happen, the Jonathan Club still stands for the old-fashioned, traditional conservative virtues, everything that is good and brave and true about being a Republican with cash to burn in Southern California.

Even Bruce Willis is starting to tear up, until someone walks in with an actual document from the founders. The "Brother Jonathan" story was a sham. The first Jonathans took their name from the story of Jonathan and David in the book of Samuel. They were the Cleveland administration forefathers of the Log Cabin Republicans.

The Broken Lizard crew provides ongoing comic relief as new members, charging around looking for the free booze and broads they've heard so much about.

Great, thanks for pissing on the party, Luke. Where am I supposed to go now?

Cool story, though. Congrats.

B-Boy, you're in England. I'm sure the clubs there are even older and stranger.

I for one have yet to get my land legs back, if you know what I mean. They were right about "the three hour cruise".