LYT's Weblog

NY/JFK has security down pat and efficient. Unlike LA, where there were exactly TWO x-ray machines and ONE (yes, one) metal detector for everyone going to the American Airlines terminal. Plus they're stupid about stuff now. In the past, if I'd gone through the metal detector, had it beep, then realize it was my belt buckle, the inspector there would have examined the belt himself and let me walk through. But NOOO...now, I have to go back to the x-ray line, put that belt in a new storage basin, then go back to the metal detector line and walk through again.

Why is it that cities where actual terrorism has happened (London, New York) are faster and more efficient about everything? You'd think they'd be the super-paranoid ones.

At JFK airport, numerous drivers will enter the baggage reclaim area and try to scam you. Like the one guy who told me he was the man assigned to meet me.

Him: Do you need a ride?
Me: No thanks, I have a car waiting.
Him: That's me. Where are you going?
Me: Stamford. They sent you to pick me up?
Him: Yes.
Me: You're the driver?
Him: Yes.
Me: What's my name?

pause

Him (in Forrest Whitaker, "Last King of Scotland" voice) Stamford! Ha ha ha ha!

At this point, he knew his BS had been called. I finally did find the right guy, who had oddly been sent to the departure lounge rather than arrivals. When I got to Stamford, it was very, very late. Holiday Inn restaurant and bar were long since closed. My dinner was a bag of Lays ruffles and a diet coke.

I didn't sleep much. Maybe 4 hours. In the morning, I had an energy drink and some breath mints. Seemed advisable. Most of the new breed of energy drinks actually work pretty good on little sleep.

I was told to get to WWE HQ by 11: 15. Holiday Inn staff told me to take the shuttle at 10:30. I did. At 10:35, I was at HQ, way too early.

But it was cold outside, so I chilled in the lobby for half an hour. During this time, I saw both Stephanie and Linda McMahon go up in the elevator (wife and daughter of the boss, for those who don't know). Steph even ran into Pat Patterson (former IC champ), and they discussed the recent injury to Steph's husband Paul (aka Triple H). Sounds like he's doing well, but severely incapacitated at the moment.

Finally, hiring guy Jon comes down and takes me upstairs. He shows me around -- various display cases hold such things as the original boots of Andre the Giant, and metal sculptures that appear to be full-body realscans of the torsos of Kane (masked) and RVD. One of the cases is empty -- I'm told it recently held a certain Olympic singlet, but that it mysteriously vanished (wrestling fans will get this reference -- would take too long to explain to anyone else).

Jon talks to me a while, then we got to the cafeteria to get me some food. While there, we encounter legendary ring announcer Howard Finkel, who is apparently leader of the staff softball team. He speaks quite normally in person.

I then go into a conference room, where shelves are filled with teddy bears patterned on the likes of Undertaker, Big Show, Randy Orton, and more. I interview first with their human-resources director. One thing notable here is that I tell her I love acting the most, but that I realize, objectively, that I'm an average actor but an above-average writer, so I've pursued writing. She drops that that says a lot about me.

Then I meet with two of the WWE head writers. Raw's head writer is a short guy named Brian Gewirtz, who looks younger than me. Smackdown's head writer is veteran wrestling star Michael "P.S." Hayes, of the Fabulous Freebirds. Hayes quizzes me on what angles are my favorite now, and of all time. Gewirtz doesn't ask as much, but I ask him a lot about his background -- he was a Hollywood sitcom writer until he got the call to replace Vince Russo in 1999, and has loved it since, but in the last 8 years, he's seen 60 writers drop out. Everyone stresses how the job is 24-7 and you need a thick skin, plus will probably be hazed something fierce.

Hayes practically blushes when I tell him I used to own his music album on cassette. I don't mention I got his new action figure for Xmas.

And then it's over. Jon quizzes me about the whole process -- he's in hiring, and doesn't know how the writing side works so much, and seems curious what I learned. He reminds me that if I don't get the job, it says a lot that I made it this far. I totally agree. I'll remember this even though nothing came of it in the end. Jon was an awesome dude, and everyone at the company seems to enjoy their job a lot. Not to mention that everybody seemed absolutely unpretentious.

As it turns out, it was primarily my lack of previous experience on TV shows that seems to have made the difference.