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September 5, 2008
One Midnite at BANGKOK
I'm feeling kinda lazy with this review, as I've been busy writing other things on the side; we'll see how that goes.
In the meantime, I'm going to do this all bullet-pointy.
Amount of minutes early I was for the midnight show: 50
Movies I walked in on briefly during that time, because the staff at the multiplex doesn't care enough to stop me: 2 -- MAMMA MIA and DISASTER MOVIE.
Why? They were the only two still running that I haven't seen all or most of already. Assessments: DISASTER MOVIE about what I expected, including a parody of The Love Guru that's actually less funny than Mike Myers. As for MAMMA MIA -- I'd rather just hear Abba do those songs. Or Erasure.
Plot of BANGKOK DANGEROUS: A hitman (Nicholas Cage) who lives by a strict set of rules ends up breaking them on his last big job. A remake of the Thai movie by the same name. As well as every other movie about a hitman who lives by his own rules.
Why it didn't screen for critics: No idea, actually. It's fairly standard stuff, with no major screw-ups.
How it rates in the Pang Brothers canon: I had more fun watching this than THE EYE and RE-CYCLE...having said that, those movies had more interesting ideas and visuals, but ultimately weren't all that well scripted.
So which rules does he break? He's not supposed to get attached to anybody, but for some reason he decides to both take on a protege and date a deaf woman who doesn't speak English. This gets him into trouble later, but you knew that. At the beginning of the movie, he bitches about how he eats dinner alone and sleeps alone. I realize a huge star like Nic may not know this, but that's true for a lot of us who aren't even hitmen.
Wig factor: Major. It gets to where you know it's him in silhouette just by the unchanging outline of his hair.
Cage mode: stoned Elvis.
Cage over-the-top moment: His first date with the deaf girl, where he delivers a running commentary on which food items are spicy and which aren't.
Best moments: Amid all the shoot-outs, there are exactly two big scenes of extremely gory acts. I won't spoil them, but they reminded me of Mortal Kombat fatalities.
In order to enjoy this, you have to believe...That Nic Cage in a jet-black hairpiece is somehow invisible and inconspicuous in a major urban area where everyone else is Asian.
Worth the ticket price? If you like fairly generic action movies that don't suck but also aren't that memorable.
Posted by LYT at September 5, 2008 2:20 AM [Message Board]
Comments
Cage Mode: Stoned Elvis---that should be his epitaph.
Posted by: Peggy C at September 6, 2008 10:00 AM
That Nic Cage in a jet-black hairpiece is somehow invisible and inconspicuous in a major urban area where everyone else is Asian.
lol
Posted by: David N. Scott at September 6, 2008 11:22 AM