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May 31, 2008

Why...?

Why did I waste so much time in the past 12 months seeing movies at The Block?

I mean, yeah, the Thursday midnight shows. Only game in town. But jeez, I just went to the Irvine Spectrum, and they had freakin' stadium seating and DTS digital sound. Also, they had employees who actually shut the auditorium doors when the movie starts. Costs the same as The Block too.

Ah well. Before too long, I expect I'll be at the Arclight and Chinese again! I might as well enjoy the free parking experience while it lasts.

One thing that's cheaper (or free) in OC is the parking, I'll give it that.

Posted by LYT at 7:26 PM | Comments (1)

STRANGERS ain't Paradise

I notice many other horror reviewers are really liking THE STRANGERS. I'm not among them.

I had intended to write an early review on the OC blog, but the notes I took during the screening are in a notebook somewhere inside the office I no longer have keys for. So I'll wing it a bit.

THE STRANGERS basically is FUNNY GAMES all over again. Well-crafted suspense in which the director refuses to give you the catharsis you seek in order to "make a point." Michael Haneke's point is a bit more artful than Bryan Bertino's point, but the latter is a first-timer, after all.

I will be discussing the ending, but after the jump so you don't have to click on it. Meanwhile, the broad strokes.

The movie begins really fucking stupidly, with a Keith David-like ominous voice telling us that this is based on true events, and gives us a few details of the supposed incident, blah blah blah. The press kit elaborates on those "true events" - when Bertino was younger, he remembered hearing about criminals who'd knock on doors asking if somebody was home. If nobody answered, they'd break in. This gave him the idea to do the opposite - criminals who break in when someone IS home, to terrorize rather than rob. True events my ass. Technically, every script is based on true events, even if those events merely involve a writer sitting at a keyboard.

The leader of the criminals dresses like Scarecrow in BATMAN BEGINS, and wheezes like Darth Vader, while his two female sidekicks (daughters, maybe? It's left vague) wear specifically feminine masks. The victims are Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman, a couple who are having issues because he just proposed and she said no. He drowns his sorrows with generic vanilla ice cream, and she with Corona, which immediately tells you he's a dork and she's too cool for him. But the way they act it out is impressive. I've always felt that both Tyler and Speedman were total pretty-face lightweights in the acting department, but Bertino brings really good performances out of them. It sounds like they were totally method about it, too, always running laps before each shot to wear themselves down emotionally.

Bertino also plays with the audience well -- that "money shot" you see in the trailer works just as well in the movie, and he teases us by building up to obvious scares which he sometimes delivers exactly how you'd expect, and others throws in a curve to keep you guessing.

Unfortunately, he neglected the most important thing a horror movie needs: a good payoff. Well, maybe not neglected. He might be trying to make a point. But in doing so he pisses me off. And if that's what he intended, like Haneke, then bravo.

SPOILERS of varying degrees follow...

The single most important thing in horror is catharsis. You jangle our nerves then give us some sort of release. Even if the bad guy wins, you have to have a moment where the hero beats the holy hell out of him and gets the upper hand (you can reverse it later as a twist if you so choose). Or maybe you side with the bad guy, a la Freddy or Jason, and the catharsis is watching them slay total dumbasses who, in movie terms at least, deserve it. Or you blow a bunch of stuff up. Or the final twist puts a different spin on everything and you see how you've been played, like in the SAW movies.

What you don't do is what Bertino does here. You know that shot in all the trailers where Liv and Scott are tied to chairs, and the three strangers stand in front of them and say "Because you were home"? When you see that, it's one of those, "Oh shit, how do they get out of this situation? I need to buy a ticket to find out!

Except they don't get out of it. Both leads are promptly stabbed to death.

And the point? Right before doing it, the strangers take off their masks, though the shots are carefully chose so that we still don't see their faces. Bertino seems to be telling us that even though he's been using them like monsters, now you can see that they're just ordinary people doing random horrific acts. Regular folks just casually destroying someone else's world.

Another thing is that the movie begins at the scene of the crime, showing you the devastation and letting you guess what happened here. The classic directorial trick would be to somehow show us at the end that we didn't see what we think we saw, somehow subverting the details. But not here. Looking at the initial crime scene, you can pretty much guess what happened, and be correct.

Had the couple managed to kill one of the strangers and then lost, I'd probably be happier. But the whole movie, I'm thinking to myself, "This is cool, it's like FUNNY GAMES, but because it's a commercial horror movie, I know it's not gonna jerk me around. The catharsis is coming." And it didn't.

In other aspects of life, we call this a cock tease.

Posted by LYT at 12:10 PM | Comments (5)

Puberty

I grew up in Ireland, where even Playboy magazine was not legal.

As far as TV -- we had two -- count 'em, TWO -- TV channels. If you could afford a 20-foot antenna, you could get four more, from England.

Then, in the late '80s, cable TV came in, bringing with it two new channels, SKY and Super (I don;t think Sky was owned by Murdoch then).

A majority of what Sky and Super showed was music videos. And among the spoils was the hit video below, which would never have passed muster in the British isles.

I was 13. I loved it.

The Youtube resolution isn't as clear as the original...but bear in mind that white bathing suits go transparent VERY easily.

Now imagine how it was to get this in a sexually barren culture...

She has an official Myspace now too.

Posted by LYT at 12:01 AM | Comments (6)

May 30, 2008

And now back to the blog

I know that over the past year, there have been slimmer pickings on this blog. When blogging becomes part of your job, the hobby elements of it inevitably suffer. And I have been very proud of some of the blog stuff I did for OC Weekly - I got them a lot of traffic.

But now I'm here. You have my undivided attention. And you're gonna get more. Unless and until someone else pays me for blog content.

The Youtube videos I've been doing of events like the Scottish festival over at OCW will continue here.

Fast food reviews will continue here.

Film reviews will be whenever I feel like it, and not just on Friday. I plan on seeing a lot more movies.

I will blog the hell out of any film festival I'm invited to. I will interview people I want to interview, whether or not they have anything new to plug.

To contact me personally, the email is lyt-at-lytrules-dot-com.

For press releases and screening invites, use lytrules-at-gmail-dot-com

Posted by LYT at 5:14 PM | Comments (0)

May 29, 2008

Big Announcement

Effective immediately, I am no longer an employee of OC Weekly.

I wish my former colleagues the best of luck in their future endeavors.

Addendum: I don't feel like getting into the whys or wherefores. As far as I can tell, I'm still welcome to freelance for Village Voice Media Publications.

But I did want to send out a special thanks to a couple of people.

R. SCOTT MOXLEY, reporting genius who brought down the sheriff of OC, for being so hands-on and helping me with my news stories when he certainly didn't have to. After this I don't think I'll ever end up a news guy, but it's not for his lack of faith or trying.

and

JANINE KAHN, my eternally dependable back-up at Comic-Con and every other time. Even among my friends, very few people ever seem to truly "get" me...but she did.

This is not to neglect any others -- I wish I could have gotten to know some of you better -- but to commend those who really went the extra mile for me. In the end, your faith will be justified. Thank you.

Also, here's my final cover story, which I wrote in 7 days, and is fully reported like they wanted...

Posted by LYT at 4:01 PM | Comments (17)

LYTrules.com EXCLUSIVE: Director David Hackl talks SAW V

I don't have a picture of David, so instead I'm re-running one of SAW V co-star Meagan Good. I doubt you'll complain...

LYT: So you designed all the traps in the previous movies?

David Hackl: Not all of them myself, but I certainly had a hand in the traps from the past few movies

-How well would they be delineated in the script, versus how you realized them?

Often times in the script it was just a line saying, you know, “then we see the most horrific Jigsaw trap we’ve ever seen before.” It’s just the sort of thing where a lot of times...sometimes the idea would be there from the beginning, for Darren there were traps in his mind that he wanted to do absolutely. There were traps that changed. For example, in Saw III, the twisty-Tim trap, where Tim gets twisted apart, that evolved form a trap Leigh Whannell had thought of that he wanted in the first Saw movie, which is a trap where a guy gets bent backwards in half and his back splits, and we drew a whole series of sketches and models. But we realized that bending someone backwards in half and splitting their spine doesn’t look great on film, because their feet have to be beside their head, basically, which means that you’re either looking at their belly, or you’re bending them backwards upside down, and no matter what, it’s gonna be so comical that it’s not gonna be visceral, it’s not gonna look horrific. So we eventually developed that into this twisting trap where we twist someone’s limbs off and twist someone’s head right around until it snapped their neck.

-And that, if I’m not mistaken, is one you had to trim for the theatrical cut quite a bit, right?

Yes. The bones jutting out of the arms and legs.

-Because I really didn’t understand it fully when I saw it in the theater, then I watched the first unrated cut – now there’s another director’s cut –

Yeah, that’s exactly it, I mean it was something that had to get edited down so badly that in the theater, it almost didn’t make sense

-My favorite, of course, is the pig-pulper

Yes, the pig-pulper was good, but that was something that also developed over time, I mean it was the sort of thing where it grew and grew and grew from a small machine with pig guts coming out of it to this giant pulley system with huge pigs falling from the ceiling into these huge blades, and then of course the little incinerator that was next to it, and the giant vat our man got strapped to the floor in. What else were your favorite traps?

-That was the main one, because it was so insane, how do you even think of that? Putrid pig corpses, you’re gonna liquefy ‘em, and you’re gonna drown someone in them, so that was awesome. One thing I still don’t get, in Saw IV, there’s the “see no evil, speak no evil” one, and I still don’t know who the bald guy was who had his eyes sewn shut. Is that something we get to in the new one?

Ah, no, we never really explain who he was, but we may in the future.

-Because in the first Saw, there’s a big deal about how these are kind of ironic traps based on people’s sins, and I was wondering when I saw that how that was an ironic punishment of sorts

Well, maybe in the future we’ll have to explain that. Certainly for the lawyer it was important, and there’ve been a few traps like that where the dead guy, or the guy who’s gonna die, is just a victim, who may have done something really bad, or may have been just a corpse.

-So now that you’re in the director’s chair, is someone else figuring out the traps, or are you still doing it?

I’m still doing it quite a bit. I still had a very big hand in it, and Patrick and Marcus, the writers, they had a lot to do with them, certainly there were a few things that they didn’t sort out, but for the most part, y’know, I mean we worked really closely in production, early in the script-writing, to make it all work out well. They pinned down a few of ‘em, but then there were a few that were just left hanging.

-The big box of glass we saw in Jigsaw’s flashback in the last one, does that pay off in this one?

I can’t tell you that

-That’s a positive sign

Whether it does or it doesn’t, it’s definitely an element that we want to hang on to.

-When you’re coming on a part 5, obviously there’s a visual style and an audio style that’s been well established. Did you feel confined by that, or were you able to bring your own thing to it?

Not at all, I mean, I wanted to maintain that style, because I wanted this to still look and feel like a Saw movie, definitely, and it’s a format that’s worked fairly well. There’s a few things I chose not to do, things like there’s a few transitional shots in this, but I didn’t go for any of the giant transitions that we did in the past, and that was a conscious decision, I wanted to make sure that at no point did the transition become self-conscious or conspicuous, but rather would just be an organic flow from one scene to the next. Because often times if it’s too conspicuous, it can be something that ruins the suspension of disbelief, and I felt like that was something I wanted to make sure was maintained, so that at no point in the movie do you fall out of it, which is my ideal.

-One of the things I noticed after watching all four in a row last year at Sawfest is that the first one has a lot of genuine scares that make you jump, whereas 2, 3, and 4 are more sort of disturbing, but not so many jump moments. How does that carry over into 5?

We definitely have a good mix of both. We definitely have some good jump moments. I love the jump moments, myself, so yeah, they’re there.

-Do we see the pig mask again?

Oh yeah. I can tell you that.

-I’ve heard that this particular arc is supposed to end with part 6. Is that something...are you on for part 6?

I’m not on for part 6, but I don’t know if it’s gonna end. It’ll end when the fans want it to end.

-Well, obviously they’ll find ways to continue, but this particular arc, do you know if that’s set to wrap up with 6?

Uh, not at this point, it’s not gonna necessarily wrap up with 6. We’re very much still in the writing stage, but I don’t think there’s any indication that it will or won’t wrap up at this point.

-Is that tough as a director, to know that you can’t wrap it up too much, that you have to leave it open ended?

No not at all, because I think that I tried to make a contained story as much as possible. It was something where I wanted to make sure that – while the story may have an ending that hangs, we’re still working on the ending, choosing which one we want to use – it’s the sort of thing that I’ve always intended to be self-contained. You know, it can’t stand alone, you have that certain history, an assumed knowledge is necessary, but I want it to be an individual story that is strong.

-So it’ll be satisfying to the viewer whether or not there’s a part 6?

Yes. Oh yeah. Absolutely.

-You’re probably sworn to secrecy, right?

Well, here’s what happens...Nahh, I’m not gonna tell you. There’s a trap in it, and then there’s another trap, with a whole bunch of acting in between, and then another trap, seven altogether.

-Can you give us some idea how much Tobin Bell is in the movie?

He’s probably there for, I would say about a quarter. He’s peppered throughout the movie, and he has good presence, but it’s not ridiculous, it certainly makes sense where he is; it’s not something where we’re trying to milk him or anything like that. I think that his presence in the whole franchise is really necessary, and I think because this answers a couple of very big questions about the whole franchise, it has some scenes that are pivotal to the franchise, that are more pivotal than scenes in some of the other movies. And I think that having Tobin’s, Jigsaw’s presence in the entire franchise is necessary because I think you wanna feel that he had a role in all of what’s going on, and certainly you can’t deny his history on this entire story, certainly in this arc. It’s really what Saw’s about.

-Do you think there’s ever a point, like if they got to Saw 10, there’s absolutely nothing more you could possibly learn about Jigsaw?

Yeah, definitely I think that’s a possibility. I think that his legacy will always be there to a certain effect, but yeah, I fear the day that they go to something like what happened with the HANNIBAL RISING movie, it was just unfortunate.

-You don’t wanna see JIGSAW RISING?

I don’t wanna see Jigsaw as a kid, no.

-That’s funny, because my boss at LA Weekly wrote in his review of SAW IV that he’d like to see JIGSAW RISING; I said no, that’s a bad idea!

Not unless he’s rising from the dead

-Well, that’s what we were all afraid of with SAW IV!

Yeah, especially in that first scene where you see his schlong, you don’t want to see that rising, necessarily.

-Was that really his schlong, though, or was it a dummy?

I don’t know. We’ve asked that question a few times, and no-one’s ever given us a straight answer.

-So you weren’t on set for that?

It was definitely a prosthetic, the whole body, but whether that was natural or not, I’m not sure. I’m certain that there was a phone call that went out that said “Cut or uncut?” at a certain point.

-Do you know if there’ll be any new action figures from NECA for this movie?

There might be, we’ve got some good new characters in this one. There may be one or two.

-You’ve got Meagan Good; I’m not sure I’ve seen her in a horror movie before.

She was stupendous.

-One of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen in a movie.

Ah, not only that, but she’s a fantastic actor, really really strong, I mean her performances were just amazing. She brought so much to this, I was really pleased.

-Can you tell us anything at all about her character?

I’m not sure what’s out there at this point yet, so I can’t really say.

-I don’t think anything.

All I can say is she’s one of the people who’s in this series of traps, and has to make certain decisions that she is not very happy with.

-Is she connected to Lyriq Bent’s character in the previous films?

No, she’s not. Definitely not. But you never know! In SAW VIII, maybe you find out she was his sister!

Posted by LYT at 12:07 AM | Comments (0)

May 28, 2008

Continuing the European '80s novelty hits

I give to you... "Woodpeckers from Space"! Like Russ Abbot, must be seen to be believed. Again, a big hit in the UK.

Posted by LYT at 7:49 PM | Comments (2)

LYTrules.com EXCLUSIVE: Tobin Bell talks SAW V

I last talked to Tobin Bell over the phone in December, for an article about the year in horror films. Though I only used a brief quote in the final piece, I used some of the rest of our conversation as the basis for an OC Weekly online exclusive, and the rest, well...it was off the record, as he grilled me on what I liked and didn't like in the SAW sequels, as well as talking about some upcoming projects too premature to announce.

At a recent Lionsgate party, a publicist told me that he couldn't stop talking about our interview. And then he sought me out. The rest, give or take a few extraneous words, is the dialogue that ensued. Be forewarned, some of it is geek-level stuff. Don't expect a ton of SAW V spoilers, but if you're a fan, I think you'll dig it.

Tobin Bell: When I saw your name on the list, I said I’m gonna talk to Luke. I’ve looked at the notes that I took; I took good notes during that conversation, because I frankly thought that a lot of your ideas were on the money

LYT: I told you at the time that THERE WILL BE BLOOD’s gonna win the Oscar, and it’s based on your line [in SAW II]

Does he say that in the film?

-he doesn’t in that movie. You say it

I know, but I kept looking...I eventually saw THERE WILL BE BLOOD on an airplane and I kept listening for that line, and I liked the film very much, but I don’t recall what the allusion was to

-yeah, there wasn’t even that much blood

No, I could just hear some studio guys going “We need a line!” There wasn’t even that much blood, that’s right, just a little bit of blood seeping onto the bowling alley at the end, that’s about it.

-so you probably can’t tell me much about SAW V, but can you tell me approximately how much screen time you get in this?

No, because I haven’t seen the cut. It’ll have a lot to do with what they do. I’m hoping they’ll tighten the whole thing up, so I couldn’t honestly tell you, I really have no idea. I’m always surprised. I always feel like less is more. I do it when I write, and I’m sure you do too, you try to cut down to something of significance.

-oh yeah, that’s always the worst part, for journalism, anyway.

But you learn a lot more about Costas Mandylor, and Detective Hoffman, and more of the Jigsaw puzzle in five.

-do we learn more about your character, significantly, do you think?

Yeah, I would say you learn a significant piece, or pieces. Now knowing you, having talked to you, I’m not sure you’ll share that point of view, but I think all the pieces come together to be one more additional moment or bit of information

-I just wanna make sure we get a lot of Jigsaw scenes, because that’s the main reason I’m there

Well, Luke, I look forward to talking to you after the film is out. I’m sure you’ll have very clear thoughts and impressions.

-Now, I know you probably haven’t seen a lot of footage, if any, but can you tell us, based on being in the set, if you think the visual style will be noticeably different with the change of directors?

No, because we have Kevin Greutert as the editor, and he’s been the editor since one. He’s the guy, in my view, who is the musician, the guy who creates the rhythms and the beats, the moments, the, uh, style of the piece. Hopefully the director is the storyteller, but Greutert, I think, creates the rhythms, and he is, by the way, gonna direct SAW VI.

-so how is David Hackl as a director different from both Darren Lynn Bousman and from James Wan?

David is a set designer, production designer. He’s an artist, he’s very visual, extremely organized. Darren...you’ve got two kinds of guys, you’ve got guys that roll up their sleeves and go “fuck, let’s go, let’s do it!” and then you’ve got a guy who’s very organized, very methodical, very contemplative. David is very thoughtful. What’s a beautiful thing about David is you can get his ear, and if you have a thought, or an idea, you never feel like you’re taxing him, you never feel like you’re struggling to get his ear, he’s really a joy to work with in that way, because it’s relaxing. Darren is...I like working with Darren too because he has all this energy, but sometimes to get through that energy to get his focus is difficult. So, y’know, you deal with different things, different bosses, somebody you like for different reasons, and I liked working with David for that reason, it was like, I would call Darren working with a storm, and working with David’s like sittin’ on a beach

-where does James Wan fit into that?

James was a very first time director – not that Darren wasn’t, David as well, but both of them were working in an environment that had been created. James walked in to what they had turned into a studio – I forget the name of the place, in downtown LA – with a million dollar budget, that had to be done on time, not that most films don’t, but so James was very...we didn’t have any of the creative discussion. Of course, I was lying on the floor in a pool of blood, so there wasn’t a whole lot for me to talk about.

-but you also obviously had to record all those lines and all the tapes and stuff

Yeah, but frequently they’d pull out the tape recorder and go “say the thing!” so I would go over in a corner and I’d say the thing. They’d use that as the wild track, I didn’t ultimately record all those tape recordings until deep into post production, when the film was almost completely locked, because the timing of them changes according to how long the film is in certain sections, so...James was like a baby in the hands of these guys, yeah, he was the director, but I got to tell you, Dan Hefner, who was the first A.D., was moving that set forward. I mean, first A.D.s do that, but I just remember very clearly how Dan was moving James around and looking at his watch. Dan’s always looking at his watch anyway, because that’s his job, but under those circumstances with a very limited budget and 18 days, Dan did his job very well, and James realized...I mean, when I saw James’ ten-minute short, I knew James could realize this film, so since he created it, he did what he wanted, but I think in answer to your question, there was not a lot of time for deep creative discussion with James Wan, I just felt he was up against the clock. I’m sure he talked to Leigh Whannell and Cary Elwes much more than he talked to me. I love James’ gentleness. Have you met him before?

-yes, I did, I met him at comic-con when he was promoting DEATH SENTENCE

I’d like to have an opportunity to work with James in a creative environment. I felt like we were working on a subway that kept stopping at stations, then it would just take off, so there wasn’t a lot of time to talk.

-On the set of the first one, was it you lying there on the floor every day? Did they ever have a dummy, or was it you in every shot?

If you saw me, it was me. It was no dummy. If they were doing close-ups, and you didn’t see me, I would get up, dripping wet, I would put on a robe covered in blood, wrap some towels around me, and go and try and take a break, have something to eat, or whatever, and they let me know when they were gonna see a piece of me, and I’d be back, I’d take off the robe, I’d take off the towel, and I’d be back down on the floor.

-that’s gotta be the hardest thing in the world, just to stay still. I’ve acted in a couple of movies, and I had to do a death scene right after I did a fight scene...I couldn’t hold my breath because I was so tired, so I knew I was gonna be seen breathing if anyone was careful.

Yeah, you try to hold your breath, you try to make sure that the position of your legs is the same as it was in the previous shot, and that’s about it! Try not to laugh.

-now I’m gonna give you a geek-level question, because I know you think about this character so deeply that you can probably answer it. It seems to me that somewhere in the series Jigsaw says that he doesn’t lie, but yet in the first one, the line about the blood being poisoned so you could dip the cigarette into it...that’s a lie, isn’t it?

Blood being poisoned?

-Remember, there’s a note where he says think about it, you don’t have to use the gun to kill Leigh Whannell’s character, the implication being that if he dips the cigarette into your blood, because you’ve supposedly killed yourself from being poisoned, that Leigh Whannell will smoke it and die – which he fakes – but obviously the blood isn’t poisoned at all, because you’re not actually dead

I dunno, I’ll have to think about that one, but listen, Luke, you may have me, who knows. I’ll have to think about that.

-I knew you were able to handle them before, so I had to throw that one out

That’s okay. I don’t have a real good answer to it, to be honest with you. I try not to lie.

-Do you ever have times with the directors where they tell you something, and you’re like, “No, Jigsaw wouldn’t do that”?

Oh yes, all the time. Hopefully we’ve talked about that before we’re on the set, because that could be a long conversation, and there’s not a lot of time to do that once you’re in the middle of the work day. Sometimes it’s a quick and easy decision – I’m trying to see if I can think of something that came up where we decided...very often the director’ll say “Oh no, have him do this!” or “have him do that.” Darren Bousman knew this guy very well. There’s a lot of people around the set who know him pretty well. Alex Cavanaugh, the costume designer, knows him well; the director of photography, David Armstrong, knows the story very well and knows him very well. David Hackl, who just did this film, was the production designer for 2, 3, and 4, and I think the people, no matter what they do, I don’t care if they sweep the stage, if they’re around, there’s merit to their thoughts, so you can learn something from them. That’s one of the great things about working with the same people over and over again.

-Can you tell us if Shawnee [Smith] is in this one?

No, she’s not in this one. There was a moment where she was supposed to be, but she ended up having to go to Bulgaria or some place like that to do some film, and so it didn’t work out. It’s kind of an idea for something, but I hope very much to get Shawnee back into the story. Some things you can control, some things you can’t.

-Has part 6 got the go-ahead already?

As far as I know, it does. It’s such a crapshoot. Let’s see what 5 does. Let’s see how the fans and the Luke Thompsons of the world feel about 5. I would think this thing has enough legs to do something in 6.

-Oh, I feel fairly sure it does

But I just don’t know.

-I had heard that tentatively they planned to end the current story arc with 6. Have you heard anything like that?

Yes, I have heard that, but, y’know, you hear a lot of things, and I half the time I don’t know what the hell’s their real...things change one month to the next. As a creative person I get involved on a certain level, but I’m not involved in the business, in the marketing, that stuff. It just depends on what those guys think is the right thing to do.

-After you did 3 and got killed off, were you amazed they found a way to bring you back for 4?

No, not really. You know, I mean look at...that’s what film is. Film, you can do anything. Anything is possible in film. Look at MICHAEL CLAYTON, that whole film is a flashback, starts in the present, the entire heart of the film is a flashback, and then you’re back in the present at the end. Look at how flashbacks are used in P.S. I LOVE YOU...have you seen it?

-No, I have not

I know it’s not your thing.

-Hey, I like some romantic comedies

See it. It’s worth seeing. It’s a really interesting use of flashbacks, written by Richard LaGravenese

-It’s interesting, because I remember when it came out, a couple of reviewers said it was the romantic comedy version of SAW

They did?

-Yeah. I’m pretty sure the LA Weekly did.

That’s bizarre. That’s really something. There’s actually a scene in Yankee Stadium, on top of the dugout, which of course endeared the film to me, because I’m a Yankee fan. What else, anything?

-I’m still waiting for an 18-inch action figure of you. If you can make that happen, please do

They only have a small one?

-Yeah. Did you ever see the 12-inch Japanese one that we talked about last time? How it was wrong because it comes with a pig mask that you never wore, only Amanda did?

I miss Amanda.

-Me too.

Posted by LYT at 2:09 AM | Comments (9)

May 27, 2008

Exclusive new clips from THE DARK KNIGHT

Two of them...

Posted by LYT at 1:43 AM | Comments (2)

LYT Samples All Things Scottish

Posted by LYT at 12:17 AM | Comments (1)

May 26, 2008

Sydney Pollack, dead at age 73

Nine months after being diagnosed with cancer.

A great director and a close-to-great actor.

A big loss to cinema.

Posted by LYT at 7:44 PM | Comments (1)

May 24, 2008

Darkness Reigns

The other night, I rewatched INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM. Having revisited the first two recently, I was curious to see if it would hold up. A big difference between watching these movies now versus when they came out is that as a kid and then later as a teen, these felt like an original creation. As a cinema-savvy adult, I look at them more in the spirit they were conceived, as tributes to the old cliffhanger serials.

The score so far:

LAST CRUSADE: Not as cringingly awful as I had remembered. The tone is still the campiest (Yes, of course you can have my autograph, Indy, signed Adolf Hitler; and that 500 year-old knight?), some of the comedy doesn't work at all ("Dad!" "What?" "Dad!" "What?"), and it's actually the only one in which Indy quite definitely has sex with the female lead in the middle of it all, merely so we can get a cheap joke in later about how dad banged her too. That said, watching it without any expectations, there's more fun to be had than I had given it credit for in '89, when the lack of suspense and scares just pissed me off.

RAIDERS: Still a classic, no doubt, but I was shocked by how slow-paced it seemed relative to how I remembered it. And there are things in there that Internet geeks would tear to pieces if it were a new movie -- most notably, how the hell does Indy know not to look at the Ark during the finale? Especially since he specifically refrained from blowing it up earlier because he wanted to see it opened just as badly as Belloq did?

CRYSTAL SKULL: A ton of fun. No need to reiterate why so soon after reviewing it.

Watching TEMPLE OF DOOM as a kid, I wanted to BE Short Round. I never wanted to be Indy, because he kissed girls (ewww). But Short Round was a kid who could do what Indy did, and even save the day when his mentor got in trouble. I could dig that. But now, as a grown up, I find kid sidekicks annoying. I was afraid this would be a deal-breaker.

I need not have worried. TEMPLE OF DOOM is not only as good as I remembered, but it holds up to my jaded cinephile eyes every bit as well as it did to the popped-out peepers of my youth. It is, in my mind, at this point, indisputably the best of the Indiana Jones movies.

How shall I count the ways? The primary one is imagination -- truly, in this film, "Anything Goes," as cued by the intro. I can name you umpteen movies with Nazis as villains, but can think of only one about a secret Hindu death cult that lowers people into lava. Tintin creator Herge used to say that he never traveled much, because on the rare occasions he did go somewhere exotic, it was exactly as he'd already pictured it -- thus Tintin had many globetrotting adventures in imaginary versions of foreign countries, encountering cowboys and Indians in America and the Incas in Peru, all during the same time frame that he ended up becoming one of the first men on the moon. Kids reading those never questioned it - it felt right.

All of which is preamble to the fact that Steven Spielberg and George Lucas seem to have stuck to an imaginary India rather than bothering to do much research on the real one. Listen, no Indian restaurant I've ever heard of serves live baby snakes or eyeball soup or even giant beetles; a guest at an Indian palace under British colonialism would have been far more likely to get served chicken tikka masala, don'cha think? [if I'm wrong, and there is such an Indian restaurant, somebody please tell me where so I can go]

And then there's the Thuggee cult, which seems to be at least as influenced by Africa here as Asia, what with the Maharajah's voodoo doll, the shrunken head on Mola Ram's headpiece, and the "black sleep of Kali," induced by drinking blood and cured by burning one's flesh. Fantasy? Sure. Who cares? Not me. It works. Just like that crazy runaway mine chase -- those tracks don't really seem too well thought out by the Thuggee. Yet the action sequence that ensues, and is perhaps more than any other responsible for the notion of summer movies as rollercoaster rides, holds up to today's standards.

I admit to not being too afraid of the leaf bugs that get in Kate Capshaw's hair -- the only frightening bugs in the whole sequence are a couple of centipedes. Chalk that one up to hanging with the bug-wrangler on Masters of Horror; I know that leaf bugs are totally harmless.

Critics of the movie have said that it's sexist and racist, and they have a bit of a point -- it portrays a 1935 attitude, with Indy at his most retro-assholeishness, out only for himself, treating Willie like crap and calling her "doll" or "sweetheart" non-stop, though like the sexist rogues of old, he ultimately does the right thing when called on, staying in the temple to free the kids when he could have bailed.

Meanwhile, Willie's a materialistic opportunist who isn't particularly nice either, and add to the mix Short Round the juvenile delinquent pickpocket, who serves as both surrogate son and servant, and you have a hilariously weird dysfunctional family unit (all named after pet dogs, too). Just as Chatter Lal says, "I cannot imagine anywhere in the world where the three of you would look at home." Those who like their heroes kinder react badly, but I love it. And yet somehow the Indy/Shorty bond still trumps Indy/Mutt in the new one, though Mutt being a sulky adult, one should expect a different vibe.

Did anyone else notice that when Indy and Willie are having their sexual stand-off trying to get the other to give in and come to bed, Shorty is sleeping in Indy's room? Are we to assume that had things gone according to plan, the two adults would have boned while the kid slept mere feet away?

Speaking of Shorty? I still like him too. The kid cheats at cards, and it takes nothing short of the threat of molten lava to bring tears to his eyes.

Then there's Mola Ram. Like Hannibal Lecter in SILENCE OF THE LAMBS, it's amazing how little screen time and dialogue he actually has, relative to the impact and iconic status he has in our minds. A guy who rips hearts out for fun, and puts children on chain gangs. I used to get sad when Darth Vader died in Jedi, but to paraphrase Dino De Laurentiis, nobody cry when Mola Ram die. Is it a racist portrayal? It may be one of an evil Indian, but it doesn't conform to any stereotype I know. Anti-racists would have a better case against Apu on The Simpsons than any of the Indian characters in TEMPLE OF DOOM.

The movie also brings us the only Indiana Jones villain in the whole series who doesn't die -- Lao Che (Roy Chiao). And he's great; the opening scene at Club Obi Wan (damn, I remember those pre-Internet days when I literally thought I was the only one who got that joke) is still classic, both for the way it begins with a completely surreal Busby Berkeley tribute in Chinese, and centers around a glowing blue antidote that heals quicker than any existing drug. I'd love to see Lao return, but unfortunately I just read on imdb that Chiao died in his seventies. Maybe we can at least get an action figure.

Internet geeks of yesteryear would no doubt have howled as loudly about obvious bluescreen as they do about CGI now. Yes, there are a few shots where you can tell. And yes, if that's enough to take you out of the movie, it has bigger problems than that. But it doesn't, so it doesn't.

Let us also not forget John Williams firing on all cylinders with the score -- this is the only Indy movie from which I actually remember music other than the main theme. The Short Round theme and the Temple of Doom theme are up there with the best of them.

Plus: the spike chamber (love the part where the corpse starts sitting up), the elephant steeds, the elderly village shaman who had to learn his lines phonetically since he spoke no English ("On de vay to Delhi...You vill stop at PANKHOT!"), the "vampire" bats, "You know how to fly a plane, don't you?" "No, do you?" [I believe the Young Indiana Jones show contradicts this, but I ignore those], the Dan Aykroyd cameo, the silencer muffled by popping champagne corks, the literal cliff-hanger at the bridge, the best use of a single four-letter expletive ever, Indy briefly turning evil...it's insanely wonderful, in every sense of those words. And all because Lucas was going through a divorce.

To bring things full circle, Spielberg is now doing Tintin. Too bad this is the pussy Steve who now says he "apologizes" for TEMPLE OF DOOM and how it scared sensitive parents. Can it, Steve -- you did good work here. And CRYSTAL SKULL gives me some hope for Tintin, though not as much as if you'd fully embrace the TEMPLE again.

Posted by LYT at 11:14 PM | Comments (5)

May 23, 2008

History Lessons

It's been a while since we've made fun of Movieguide, but they're just begging for it this week:

"INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL is a good starting point for teaching children the history of why Communism is such an evil, morally bankrupt and fallacious ideology."

"a light politically correct, slightly revisionist history scene with the hero objecting to a McCarthy-esque government blacklist"

"Movies about alien visitors aren’t necessarily anti-biblical, but they many people have used them to lead people away from God’s Truth, including the historical truth of the Bible and the Gospel of Jesus Christ."

Posted by LYT at 11:35 PM | Comments (1)

May 22, 2008

Boll-a-palooza!

The audio of me interviewing Uwe Boll is now online. You should really listen to it.

It's about 30 minutes, if I remember correctly.

Posted by LYT at 6:06 PM | Comments (0)

'80s music vidoes could be incredibly depressing sometimes...

Posted by LYT at 2:20 AM | Comments (1)

May 21, 2008

My interview with Uwe Boll

The reviled German director talked to me at length. Remember when I gave him a favorable review, and a commenter here told me "you fail at life"?

There will be audio form this interview as soon as the LA Weekly webmaster can make it happen, and I will urge you all to listen to it then. In the meantime...

While Boll will cop to the miscasting of Tara Reid as an academic in 2005’s Alone in the Dark, he has mixed feelings about his newfound ironic status. “If you have House of the Dead,” Boll says of his 2003 zombie-shooting-game adaptation, “it’s kind of campy, and I know that people maybe enjoy it because it’s kind of stupid and over-the-top craziness, violence and gore. But if you say this about In the Name of the King, for example, I would say you’re wrong. I saw people sitting in the theater, when Burt Reynolds dies, and they had tears in their eyes, right? So if people say that it’s the most silly scene when Burt Reynolds dies, I’m not sure that this is the case. I think it was a good scene.”

Posted by LYT at 8:17 PM | Comments (2)

This was actually a top ten hit in the UK

I remember watching Top of the Pops one week, and it was actually higher on the charts than Madonna's "Like a Virgin."

You have to watch it to believe it.

And Wikipedia says: "After many years, Russ Abbot bought the performing rights to his hit 'Atmosphere,' and refuses to allow it to be played on radio as he considers it to be a dire representation of his talents; however, many consider this to be a classic novelty hit (it spent two months in the UK Top 20 in 1984)."

Posted by LYT at 5:52 PM | Comments (6)

Indy, I love you!

Want to read my review of Indiana Jones part four? Don't whine about minor spoiler details if you do. Frankly, the plot points aren't what matter anyway; it's the execution of the action sequences, which is top-notch.

Anyway, here's my intro:

I call it INDIANA JONES AND THE KICKING OF YOUR CRYSTAL ASS.

(Don't tell me that "crystal ass" makes no sense. If Echo and the Bunnymen can sing about shattering your crystal heart, I can move the metaphor to other regions of the body.)

Posted by LYT at 3:27 PM | Comments (4)

May 20, 2008

I hate to sound like an old man

But here's substantial proof that the '80s were better for pop-culture than now: Today, you would not, could not, have a chart-topping hit single in the U.S. that's in German and inspired by an Oscar-winning movie.

And another thing -- how much more cinematic is this music video than anything similar today?

Posted by LYT at 1:35 AM | Comments (5)

May 19, 2008

Two L.A. Press Club Award Nominations

Signed Commentary, DAILY/WEEKLY NEWSPAPERS
Under 100,000 circulation: Luke Y. Thompson, O.C. Weekly, "Fight Club."

ENTERTAINMENT REVIEWS/CRITICISM/COLUMN, DAILY/WEEKLY NEWSPAPERS
Under 100,000 circulation: Luke Y. Thompson, OC Weekly, “Rock’em, Sock’em”

Wish me luck! Winners chosen June 21st.

Posted by LYT at 11:35 PM | Comments (4)

Bill O'Reilly dance remix

Hilarity.

Thanks to OC Weekly theater critic Joel Beers for the link.

Posted by LYT at 1:51 AM | Comments (0)

May 18, 2008

George Lucas just made sweet, sweet love to my youth

Everything you've heard is true, except for the "sucking" part. This movie made me very happy.

Uppity nerds, George and Steve just earned a reprieve, whether you wish to acknowledge it or not.

More to come on Wednesday.

Posted by LYT at 7:08 PM | Comments (9)

A portrait at 33

Every finger in the room is pointing at me
I want to spit in their faces, but I get afraid of what that could bring
I've got a bowling ball in my stomach, got a desert in my mouth
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now
I've been looking for a savior in these dirty streets
Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets
I've been raising up my hands, drive another nail in
Just what God needs: One more victim

Why do we crucify ourselves?
Every day I crucify myself
Nothing I do is good enough for you, and my heart is sick of being in chains.

Posted by LYT at 2:16 AM | Comments (7)

May 17, 2008

Drinks with Derek

A series of four photos I took a while back and just found:

Posted by LYT at 2:25 PM | Comments (0)

May 16, 2008

Narnia returns

...and I'm there to review it. A sample:

Mostly, Susan (Anna Popplewell) does the saving, which is a big change from the book. Because it's now the modern postfeminist era, she has been made a master of the bow and arrow, basically Legolas but more macho than Orlando Bloom (which isn't hard, of course; Oprah is more macho than Legolas). Also, I'm pretty sure C.S. lewis never said that Susan was smoking hot, but she is, I mean damn. Anna invades my dreams now. And she's been legal several years now, so don't gimme crap about it. As longtime Narnia fans know, Susan's affinity for makeup and boys will lead to trouble down the line, and I guess I understand why now. She so fine she gots to play it.

Posted by LYT at 8:47 AM | Comments (6)

May 13, 2008

My Grandfather's Column

(Note: My grandfather has begun adding his email to the end of his columns for readers who have questions. With a slight modification to avoid spambots, I'm posting it here too so that his Internet readers can do likewise)

What about the Holy Spirit?

According to the biblical record Jesus promised that the Holy Spirit, whom he would send, would guide his followers into all truth. We cannot know God directly but we can recognise his Spirit, for we see that Spirit in the words and works of Jesus as recorded in our New Testament. This Spirit has always been at work in the world, teaching us how to behave and how to tame our over-clamant instincts when they are liable to cause hurt to others. What Jesus promised was that his followers would actually find this Spirit within themselves enabling them to do the very same sort of work that He himself had done. The trouble with many Christians is that they simply don't believe this; so they remain weak and powerless. At the same time there are other Christians who wrongly think that because they have the Spirit of God within them they know all the answers. Sometimes they point to the saying: "The Holy Spirit will lead you into all truth."

Now I regard this as a message of hope. In spite of the frightful mess Jesus' followers have made of the pure and lovely religion he bequeathed to us; in spite of the vicious and quite unchristian ways in which some Church leaders behave towards those whom they should, in the words of our founder, love as he has loved us; in spite of the many evil things that have been done in Christ's came, the time will eventually come when the Holy Spirit will have completed his guiding, when we shall know as we are known by God and when all shall be well. Of course we cannot know when that time will come but Christians are meant to live in hope as well as in faith and love.

-Peter Graham
peter.graham [at] bucklandnewton.com

Posted by LYT at 9:59 AM | Comments (0)

Indiana Jones

I'm seeing it on Sunday. Anyone want to come with?

Posted by LYT at 12:46 AM | Comments (3)

May 11, 2008

Cheers!

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May 10, 2008

Miley High Club

I'm usually a free-speech advocate, but I dunno about this infamous photo.

I think it's pretty offensive, personally. Think about how the parents must feel.

Posted by LYT at 11:22 PM | Comments (5)

May 9, 2008

Excelsior, True Believers!

Check out my report on yesterday's OC appearance by Stan Lee.

Posted by LYT at 1:41 AM | Comments (1)

May 8, 2008

Rocky's Road

I have the cover story of OC Weekly today. Here's a taste:

Chances are you’ve never heard of Rocky Costanzo or Amhurst. Yet, at age 34, Costanzo and the company he heads, LifeLine Entertainment, have made four feature films, all available on (and direct-to) DVD. LifeLine’s swanky Huntington Beach suite looks like the ultimate bachelor pad, all dark colors and candles, equipped with PlayStation 3, and augmented with a fridge fully stocked with such novelty sodas as Bubble Up and Rat Bastard Root Beer.

LifeLine has been successful enough that it’s no trouble to pay the rent on such a place, but Costanzo and his associates have yet to turn enough of a profit to quit their day jobs. By day, Costanzo hauls asphalt for the city of Huntington Beach. Chief Operations Officer Roy Thomasson handles car-damage management for Avis...

LifeLine’s website touts it as “Orange County’s very own independent film company,” with the goal of “bring[ing] forward festival-award-winning U.S. independent feature films and focus[ing] on rare, unique and sometimes edgy titles featuring up-and-coming filmmakers.” To date, however, LifeLine has exclusively released titles by exactly one filmmaker: Rocky Costanzo.

Posted by LYT at 11:28 PM | Comments (0)

Uwe Boll's POSTAL...

...is like Southland Tales, but better.

More on this after I meet the director in person. I will not be bringing my boxing gloves.

Posted by LYT at 12:10 AM | Comments (0)

May 6, 2008

Movies etcetera

The Newport Beach Film Festival has concluded. Get caught up on all my coverage here.

And now it's time to look ahead to the summer movies. Which I do in the video below.

Posted by LYT at 12:14 AM | Comments (0)

May 5, 2008

Best movie trailer I've seen in a long time.

You'll think I'm kidding when you click the link, but seriously, WATCH IT.

Posted by LYT at 6:23 PM | Comments (3)

WICKED LAKE world premiere video

Posted by LYT at 2:30 AM | Comments (1)

May 3, 2008

WICKED LAKE invades Fango-Con (7 days ago)

[NOTE: All photos taken by me and must be credited as such if "appropriated"]

The LA convention center was also hosting a porn convention at the same time.

Pluses of the new venue -- more space, more parking. Minuses -- no bar, only one snack stand.

First thing in the hall is the Fever Dreams booth, where I take a seat.

Sean Cain promoting his film NAKED BENEATH THE WATER (also featuring me) and Under the Bed Films.

Killer Klowns.

James Duval, who finally became the proud owner of a MAD COWGIRL DVD that day, courtesy of Victor B at Fever Dreams.

Impromptu tailgate party with Justin Stone, Marc Senter, Chris Sivertson.

The world premiere of SPEED RACER was happening across the street.

As were some beers at the Holiday Inn. Here's Eryn Joslyn and a tattooed guy named Josh (I think), beneath skyscraper-sized ads for Grand Theft Auto.

Signed posters for all.

Cast, crew, etc.

Carlee Baker, Eve Mauro

When the zombies take over, oblivious Jesse Hlubik will be the first to go.

Wicked Lake discussion panel with everybody EXCEPT me.

Wicked witches.

Posted by LYT at 4:50 PM | Comments (0)

What's in yer heeeead, in yer heeeead

Erik Childress feels I have sinned by loving ZOMBIE STRIPPERS too much...

Luke, I know we're facebook friends and I wish you all the best - but you have to give up your credentials. I’m sorry. It may sound rash, but we can’t have a critic saying this. It’s not helping our argument. That’s officially your last review outside the pages of AVN.

Of course he's willing to forgive a hot chick who likes it. But all guys have that double-standard. Except when it comes to movies about hot chick zombies, it seems. Erik, if you're reading and you really do think you can swing me a job at AVN, I'm listening.

And while we're on the topic of females and zombies...

Posted by LYT at 4:33 PM | Comments (1)

May 1, 2008

Self Portrait

Yeah, clearly I don't quite have the sobriety thing down yet...

Posted by LYT at 12:40 AM | Comments (2)